Matabele
Journey Man
I'm sure Dan will have an opinion on this one:
Tom Coady
Friday, September 14, 2007 at 09:31am
A recent article where June Dally Watkins suggested that women should care more for their men got me thinking: Australian women are really very hard and unattractive. I believe this is due to a fear and insecurity they need to get over so that Australian men and women can enjoy less strained relations.
The crux of the problem seems to be that Australian women want the care of Australia men, but behave like men themselves.
Here at the Daily Telegraph, we have a regular parade of Australian beauties. I’ve seen Erin McNaught, Megan Gale and Jennifer Hawkins here - supposed female icons – and all I can say is that they were really lack lustre.
Having travelled through South America and Europe I can understand why many Australian men go searching for foreign woman. Sure there can be a problem with culture and language at times but there seems to be a whole lot more care and femininity on tap.
These women don’t see men as competitive. And they don’t behave with inhibition. But Australian women have a sense of inhibition around men.
I think there’s a lot of resentment by Aussie men to Aussie women because they don’t feel like they’re cared by them, as Ms Dally-Watkins implied. It’s as if Aussie women just don’t know how to show their interest in us.
One of my chief complaints is that they never make eye contact. Foreign women aren’t afraid to lock eyes. Aussie women never make eye contact on the street and they seem uncomfortable with the attention even when they clearly crave by dressing seductively.
But when Aussie women dress in feminine clothes, they don’t seem physically comfortable with themselves. I’d go as far to say they seem self conscious and frigid compared to foreign women.
Australian women might dress up in sexy stuff on weekends, but they don’t emanate a sexiness. Rather, they use seductive dress codes like armour. A sort of power trip used over men since they often affect total disinterest.
Maybe it is centuries of culture that makes foreign women feel more self confident. South American and Brazilian women in particular feel very confident in themselves and it shows in their attractiveness. European women use their clothes to bring on their femininity, and it’s done with a sense of trust and adventure. They just seem more open to the opposite sex.
At times I feel like Australian woman find it offensive to be actively admired by men. Instead, we have to play the game that’s all subtle and discreet. Nothing can be out in the open. They can’t seem to relax and think ‘I just need to be comfortable with myself and not blame the guys’.
Overall it just makes Aussie women unappealing.
Perhaps there needs to be a more open dialog between the sexes since there seems to be a sense that Aussie men aren’t up to scratch. But men are not given the chance to have the discussion.
Men are more straight forward than women in general, but also, more open to talking about self improvement. I find women are less candid about the way they behave in relation to men. They’d rather have those discussions to their women friends than let men be part of a dialog.
The whole women’s liberation movement distorted relations further in Australia by making women think they needed to be more masculine in day to day living and working. But strength in a woman does not come from being more masculine. It comes from being more feminine and comfortable in themselves.
As soon as women realise this, it will remove a huge burden for them to be less manly. They’ll be able to engage in their feminine strengths. Men will feel capable and caring in their masculinity rather than defunct.
It’ll be a relief to men because they’ll be around women again rather than fake-men. Only then can we enjoy relationships of a true equal nature.
Sure, some women can have more testosterone and some men can have more oestrogen, but women dropping the role of being a man would bring them more strength. I believe women would relish this opportunity to be feminine again, and it doesn’t have to be at the expense of their careers.
Women know this and they want it, but society dictates that if they don’t project they’re on top of life, then they are somehow weak. They equate that strength with masculinity and consequently copy it.
When are we going to grow up and see it otherwise? It’s getting boring and monotonous.
I feel that if Australian women and foreign women could have a dialog, then Aussies could realise that men aren’t to be feared. They’re to be celebrated as much as we are to celebrate them.
If anything, these fears are just the inner demons of Australian women rather than those of the opposite sex they seem to detest. Wouldn’t it be a good thing to overcome these fears and get to a level of comfort and acceptance?
Of the few women I’ve spoken about this matter, 9 times out of 10 they’ve agreed, but not known how to deal with it themselves. As uncomfortable as it to admit, they acknowledge a grain of truth to it.
They also complain about a lack of available men. This could well point to the fact there’s a lack within themselves and that they could have an abundance of men in their lives if they addressed the source of their own personal contractions.
At the end of the day, if we want a stronger brighter future for men and women in this country, then perhaps personal responsible is the key rather than projecting a personal inadequacy.
The source of their problems stem from their own lack of self worth. Then this translates in to a sense that men are not up to par themselves. Men have become the gage of women’s personal happiness rather than women being their own gage. Wouldn’t it make sense for women to take more responsibility for themselves, since their problems stem from within?
Travelling can be a really great thing for men at times because they can get more warmth from women. But then they come back home and it’s all competitive and detached rather than the playfulness we experience between the sexes overseas.
As much as I love living in Sydney for its beautiful nature and my friends, my experience with Australian women has been nothing short of a challenge. My flatmate would concur. Hence all my relationships have been with women of ethnic backgrounds and recent migrants.
Having said all this, I’ve got female friends who are Australian, but they’re just friends. I respect and love them as people, but not romantically.
I often feel that when I look at women in Sydney, they look like they feel personal pain, rather than a sense of connection with men.
Maybe it’s time they come full circle and have a sense of understanding that men aren’t the source of their pain, but a source of celebration and healing.
Fear between the sexes is really just an illusion. If we choose, it could be a laugh at the end of the day. There’s nothing ultimately to fear and a lot of understanding to gain.
I see the heart behind every defence. I guess I’m just looking forward to enjoying the heart rather than the defence, which many men I know would understand and appreciate. Women need to understand that they are by no means being belittled if they let go of the face which they hold up as a bastion of strength – which ultimately makes them feel saddened inside.
More power to the woman being truly feminine.
Tom Coady
Friday, September 14, 2007 at 09:31am
A recent article where June Dally Watkins suggested that women should care more for their men got me thinking: Australian women are really very hard and unattractive. I believe this is due to a fear and insecurity they need to get over so that Australian men and women can enjoy less strained relations.
The crux of the problem seems to be that Australian women want the care of Australia men, but behave like men themselves.
Here at the Daily Telegraph, we have a regular parade of Australian beauties. I’ve seen Erin McNaught, Megan Gale and Jennifer Hawkins here - supposed female icons – and all I can say is that they were really lack lustre.
Having travelled through South America and Europe I can understand why many Australian men go searching for foreign woman. Sure there can be a problem with culture and language at times but there seems to be a whole lot more care and femininity on tap.
These women don’t see men as competitive. And they don’t behave with inhibition. But Australian women have a sense of inhibition around men.
I think there’s a lot of resentment by Aussie men to Aussie women because they don’t feel like they’re cared by them, as Ms Dally-Watkins implied. It’s as if Aussie women just don’t know how to show their interest in us.
One of my chief complaints is that they never make eye contact. Foreign women aren’t afraid to lock eyes. Aussie women never make eye contact on the street and they seem uncomfortable with the attention even when they clearly crave by dressing seductively.
But when Aussie women dress in feminine clothes, they don’t seem physically comfortable with themselves. I’d go as far to say they seem self conscious and frigid compared to foreign women.
Australian women might dress up in sexy stuff on weekends, but they don’t emanate a sexiness. Rather, they use seductive dress codes like armour. A sort of power trip used over men since they often affect total disinterest.
Maybe it is centuries of culture that makes foreign women feel more self confident. South American and Brazilian women in particular feel very confident in themselves and it shows in their attractiveness. European women use their clothes to bring on their femininity, and it’s done with a sense of trust and adventure. They just seem more open to the opposite sex.
At times I feel like Australian woman find it offensive to be actively admired by men. Instead, we have to play the game that’s all subtle and discreet. Nothing can be out in the open. They can’t seem to relax and think ‘I just need to be comfortable with myself and not blame the guys’.
Overall it just makes Aussie women unappealing.
Perhaps there needs to be a more open dialog between the sexes since there seems to be a sense that Aussie men aren’t up to scratch. But men are not given the chance to have the discussion.
Men are more straight forward than women in general, but also, more open to talking about self improvement. I find women are less candid about the way they behave in relation to men. They’d rather have those discussions to their women friends than let men be part of a dialog.
The whole women’s liberation movement distorted relations further in Australia by making women think they needed to be more masculine in day to day living and working. But strength in a woman does not come from being more masculine. It comes from being more feminine and comfortable in themselves.
As soon as women realise this, it will remove a huge burden for them to be less manly. They’ll be able to engage in their feminine strengths. Men will feel capable and caring in their masculinity rather than defunct.
It’ll be a relief to men because they’ll be around women again rather than fake-men. Only then can we enjoy relationships of a true equal nature.
Sure, some women can have more testosterone and some men can have more oestrogen, but women dropping the role of being a man would bring them more strength. I believe women would relish this opportunity to be feminine again, and it doesn’t have to be at the expense of their careers.
Women know this and they want it, but society dictates that if they don’t project they’re on top of life, then they are somehow weak. They equate that strength with masculinity and consequently copy it.
When are we going to grow up and see it otherwise? It’s getting boring and monotonous.
I feel that if Australian women and foreign women could have a dialog, then Aussies could realise that men aren’t to be feared. They’re to be celebrated as much as we are to celebrate them.
If anything, these fears are just the inner demons of Australian women rather than those of the opposite sex they seem to detest. Wouldn’t it be a good thing to overcome these fears and get to a level of comfort and acceptance?
Of the few women I’ve spoken about this matter, 9 times out of 10 they’ve agreed, but not known how to deal with it themselves. As uncomfortable as it to admit, they acknowledge a grain of truth to it.
They also complain about a lack of available men. This could well point to the fact there’s a lack within themselves and that they could have an abundance of men in their lives if they addressed the source of their own personal contractions.
At the end of the day, if we want a stronger brighter future for men and women in this country, then perhaps personal responsible is the key rather than projecting a personal inadequacy.
The source of their problems stem from their own lack of self worth. Then this translates in to a sense that men are not up to par themselves. Men have become the gage of women’s personal happiness rather than women being their own gage. Wouldn’t it make sense for women to take more responsibility for themselves, since their problems stem from within?
Travelling can be a really great thing for men at times because they can get more warmth from women. But then they come back home and it’s all competitive and detached rather than the playfulness we experience between the sexes overseas.
As much as I love living in Sydney for its beautiful nature and my friends, my experience with Australian women has been nothing short of a challenge. My flatmate would concur. Hence all my relationships have been with women of ethnic backgrounds and recent migrants.
Having said all this, I’ve got female friends who are Australian, but they’re just friends. I respect and love them as people, but not romantically.
I often feel that when I look at women in Sydney, they look like they feel personal pain, rather than a sense of connection with men.
Maybe it’s time they come full circle and have a sense of understanding that men aren’t the source of their pain, but a source of celebration and healing.
Fear between the sexes is really just an illusion. If we choose, it could be a laugh at the end of the day. There’s nothing ultimately to fear and a lot of understanding to gain.
I see the heart behind every defence. I guess I’m just looking forward to enjoying the heart rather than the defence, which many men I know would understand and appreciate. Women need to understand that they are by no means being belittled if they let go of the face which they hold up as a bastion of strength – which ultimately makes them feel saddened inside.
More power to the woman being truly feminine.
