Funnies -> chuk in your own

[PJ]

Q. What did one saggy tit say to the other saggy tit?
A. If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts!

 

[PJ]

Q: What is the difference between and Virgin and a washing machine?
A: The washing machine doesn't follow you around for two weeks after you dump a load in it!

 

[PJ]

Mickey goes to the judge after speaking to him before about getting a divorce with Minney. The judge says "I'm sorry Mickey but I couldn't find grounds for divorce for being insane. Mickey looks stunned and says "I didn't say she was insane I said she was fcuking Goofy

 

[Dan]

that mickey mouse one is gold

 

[clontaago]

Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna crashed into a cemetery.

Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.

 

[Dan]

1. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to wake up with breath that could knock a buzzard off a **** truck at 100 yards.

2. WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.

3. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.

4. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.

5. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the boss what you REALLY think while photocopying your butt at the office Christmas party.

6. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.

7. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell ever happened to your pants anyway.

8. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember)

9. WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burn on the forehead.

10. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Psycho.

11. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

12. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.

13. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

14. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause a flux in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to disappear.

15. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.

 

[ChuckWood]

7 dwarves in a bathtub feeling happy , so Happy got out !

An Irishman drives out to the airport & sees a sign "airport left" , so he went home.

Sorry , that's the best I could do after a busy working week & 7 Melbourne Bitters.

 

[Narcissus]

One cow turns to another and says "mate, I'm really worried about this mad cow disease."

The other cow says "well, I don't know about you, but I don't have to worry about it at all!"

"Why's that?", asks the first cow.

The second cow looks at him and just says "because I'm a chicken."

 

[Utility Player]

Why do Gorilla's have big nostrils

Because they have big fingers



Why dont blind people skydive

It scares the crap out of the dog


What goes clop clop bang bang clop clop

An amish drive by shooting


How do you catch a unique Rabbit

unique up on it


How do you catch a tame rabbit

tame way unique up on it


Why is Tigger unpopular

he plays with Pooh

 

[clontaago]

What do you call a lesbian with fat fingers?

Well hung