Maybe we could do this:
Dear Sir/Madam, due to the high interest in our major sponsorship we would like to encourage you to apply for usage on our jumper.
Benefits:
Currently, we have the worst ground in the NRL, please don't bring your clients if it rains. Our corporate boxes have been historically very small so please don't bring anyone over 60kg as they won't fit.
Our head coach likes to "remain under the radar" so please don't tell anyone about our club, or your sponsorship. This way we can sneak up the ladder and make the grand final and no-one will know.
Our upper management team consists of a media personality (please don't think Russell type) with under 5 ratings on a radio show. Myself, I have had a range of jobs including driving a taxi.
We know you will see great benefit in providing one million dollars of your cash each year. We also advertise on an obscure NZ tv station (all in Maori language) so don't worry, it won't affect your business. We don't play much on prime time Friday nights (that goes to David's Roosters and the Saints)
Best wishes  ########
Dear Sir/Madam, due to the high interest in our major sponsorship we would like to encourage you to apply for usage on our jumper.
Benefits:
Currently, we have the worst ground in the NRL, please don't bring your clients if it rains. Our corporate boxes have been historically very small so please don't bring anyone over 60kg as they won't fit.
Our head coach likes to "remain under the radar" so please don't tell anyone about our club, or your sponsorship. This way we can sneak up the ladder and make the grand final and no-one will know.
Our upper management team consists of a media personality (please don't think Russell type) with under 5 ratings on a radio show. Myself, I have had a range of jobs including driving a taxi.
We know you will see great benefit in providing one million dollars of your cash each year. We also advertise on an obscure NZ tv station (all in Maori language) so don't worry, it won't affect your business. We don't play much on prime time Friday nights (that goes to David's Roosters and the Saints)
Best wishes  ########